vampireapologist:

imagine trying out a super risky outfit ur not sure is gonna land well and on your way to the party you fall into a bog and become a bog body and in like 3,000 years they pull you out in like a pink mesh bathing suit with an applique that says “barbie girl” on the front tucked in as a body suit to a pair of track shorts that say “your card was declined” on the ass and a pair of elevated 90s gel sandals with a hitclips clipped to the strap with one cartridge (60 seconds of an nsync song) and they reconstruct you in a museum and tell the public that’s how people dressed

(via perspired)

stardustparker:

reasons i want to be rich

• to randomly fill up people’s entire gofundme’s
  
• to be able to tip a thousand dollars to a stressed server at a restaurant
  
• to give really good gifts for birthdays that arent just gift cards
• to be able to actually afford my real sense of style
• to pay my mom’s bills and debts

reasons i dont want to be rich

• to hoard the entire fucking planet’s resources and kill off the world’s population slowly 
  

(via extremiti)

moonnations:

bluesargentsclues:

nuggetemily:

letshearitforthisclown:

watching steven universe is the polar opposite of eating pussy

literally every kind of tumbler discourse is happening in the notes of this

Here’s a sampler if you don’t want to spend hours scrolling through:

When you open a full group chat after leaving it for hours

(Source: graynard, via roseluvstigers)

tandembicycles:

greedtheavariciouslygay:

somecunttookmyurl:

tandembicycles:

somecunttookmyurl:

tandembicycles:

what if we called “flat” soda “flaccid” soda instead

hey, tandem?

I’m out for the evening

ok i’ll wait

Tandem, come home and face the horror you’ve created

no

(via roseluvstigers)

juniperberrie:

beachcryptid:

beachcryptid:

beachcryptid:

anyone remember those betty crocker infomercials they played on cartoon network in the like the early-mid 2000s for no reason

there was also the chocolate factory commerical

My whole body just experienced deja vu 

(via rosejutsu)

thelegendary-nico:

beatlemeat:

This. Peel away at my layers. Everything that makes me ME…and at the core, Looney Tunes is all you’ll find.

(via roseluvstigers)